By gerriewalkerinspires on 2015-07-14
Dear Heavenly Father I want to be your baby girl, dear Heavenly Father I want to be your baby, dear Heavenly Father I want to be your baby girl, dear Heavenly Father I want to be your baby, I want to be your baby, I want to be your baby, I want to be your baby
Dear Heavenly Father, Sweet Loving Presence, Lord I feel like I am excited about the day, I feel like I am fulfilling a prophesy of my life and every time I feel as I get closer and closer to the foretelling of what is my future, what is my destiny, what is my next phase of my life? I find myself pulling back, I find myself not sure of where I am going, I find myself questioning my moves and my motives, I find myself questioning myself.
I find myself Lord unsure, and that’s not like me my Father, that’s not like me. That’s not like me the person who is positive, the person who sees life as an amazing event and wants to be a part of the confetti party at all times, that’s not like me. Today I wanted to write about the confetti party, the parade that I see all the time in my mind about my life, but as I began to see that I once again had feelings of are you sure you are going, are you sure you are doing the right thing? Are you sure you are going the right way? Are you sure you are in the right house of worship, are you sure?
Now I don’t know about you but when I question myself deeply like that I have to ask myself am I sure? Where are all these questions coming up from and thank God they are coming up for me I guess. But I need to find out what is my true role and destiny in it all. I need to figure out why I have such doubt and concern? I need to understand why I am being questioned and why I am questioning myself. I need to know why, and the only way for me to figure out the reason why. The only way for me to understand the reason why, the only way for me to be able to figure out why is to ask my Father.
My Father, my Heavenly Father am I going the right way? My Heavenly Father am I seeking the right source? Am I engaging in the right activity? Am I making the right moves so that I can make the right outcome come in my life? And I can’t figure that all out by myself. I need to figure that out by being a part of the stream of consciousness that helps me to understand, I need to go into prayer about it. I need to meditate about it and to just keep it constantly in my thought path that there is some concern, there is some question, there are some issues that need to be resolved.
So I will continue to seek myself out, try to find out for myself why I am asking these questions. And then I am going to take some time to just think about some things. Maybe I need to take a Sunday to just spend some time with me and minister to myself. And then also maybe I need to take some time to see what is being ministered to me, is it serving me, is it allowing me to be served and is it allowing me to be of service. So these are the scary questions, these are the scary ideals; these are the scary points that I am trying to figure out. But what I am excited about is the fact that I am trying to figure them out at all. I’m not wanting anyone else to provide me with the answers I want my Father to tell me what I need to do and what I need to know.
The God presence within me to bring out into the consciousness from the sub-consciousness what I need to identify with. I need to know what I am dealing with so I can know how to deal with it. So I will sit back in my seat and I will raise my head to the sky and I will say a prayer of helping me to understand and I will see within myself that that prayer is sent forward so that I can receive what needs to be given to me and isn’t’ this time of the year the greatest time to re-evaluate and reflect on yourself. Thank you God for allowing me to ask the questions that I have been wanting to ask of myself. Thank you my Father for allowing me to see that there is nothing wrong with having a question, there is nothing wrong with needing an answer, no there is nothing wrong with feeling conflicted. And thank you God for showing me that it’s all right to have questions, it’s all right to need answers, it’s all right, it’s all right and so it is, Amen and amen